


I've never felt like this before

by Sharmansbabe



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, But it's at the beginning, Everything is black and grey until they had a soulmate waiting for them, M/M, Minor Character Death, Soulmates, don't worry it doesn't matter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-13
Updated: 2014-11-13
Packaged: 2018-02-25 05:53:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2610830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sharmansbabe/pseuds/Sharmansbabe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Soulmate AU where everything is in black and grey until you has a soulmate waiting for you in the world. And then colors happen. And then love happens. Or not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I've never felt like this before

**Author's Note:**

> Well, well, well! I've been obsessed with Soulmate AUs since a couple of weeks and I was so bored in Science that I wrote this! I don't know if I'll do like, a second part where they talk and everything, I was supposed to do it at first, but I don't know anymore. 
> 
> This was beta'ed by the beautiful and amazing elizabethdarcy on tumblr!   
> Thank you so much, you are a lovely person! *heart*
> 
> I'm obsessedbysharman on tumblr, come and talk to me, I don't bite! Xx

Life was very different for everybody. Some people see the world in gray and black and others see it in colors. That meant that they had a soulmate waiting for them. Some people found them pretty quickly; for others, it could take years to find them. Some people never meet their soulmates and are only seeing the world in colors. But if you were not worthy enough, no soulmate would be given to you and you'll only see shades of blacks and grays for your entire life.

There were a few ways you could tell that you had found your soulmate. You'd feel it in your bones; you'd know it deep down in you that they're the one and only; you'd actually fall in love with them and it’d be impossible to fall in love with anybody else. You'd start to see colors at the same time when you’d come together in the same spot. You'd just know that everything's different, ever since you met them.

It's that easy.

Mickey's been seeing colors since he was thirteen. He was the first one in the family, but he never found out who his soulmate was. He was now nineteen and he was doing his grocery shopping when his world started to fade away quickly, returning to blacks and grays in thirty seconds.

Mickey dropped whatever he had in his hands and squeezed his eyes shut really hard and opening them again, but nothing changed.

The colors were gone.

He rushed out of the store and ran to his car, driving home faster than he was supposed to do, but he didn't give two fucks at the moment. He rushed into his little apartment that he was sharing with his sister, Mandy and called out for her name.

Mandy came out of her room, frowning slightly when she saw her brother's face. "Mickey? Mickey!" she said, "what happened?!"

Mickey squeezed his eyes shut again and opened them, repeating the motion a couple of times. Mandy was starting to get worried.

"Jesus, Mickey! Tell me what's happening!" she practically screamed.

"I can't see colors anymore, Mandy!" He screamed crazily. "Mandy, what does it means?"

Mandy had her mouth open and she slowly covered in with her hand, in shock. Mickey didn't understand, he was getting crazier by the second.

"Mands! What the fuck does it means? What's happening to me?! For fuck's sake, MANDY!" He grabbed her by her shoulders. "Just fucking tell me!"

Mandy gulped and she hugged Mickey, whispering in his ears slowly. "It means your soulmate's dead, Mick.."

What Mandy said hit Mickey like a brick. "Are you.. for real?" He asked, his voice cracking.

Mandy sighed loudly, hugging her brother harder than before. "I'm sorry, Mick, I'm so sorry..."

***

Now that his soulmate was dead, Mickey felt completely hopeless.

He was secretly hoping since he was thirteen that, once he met his soulmate, he'd finally feel happy. That he'd say goodbye to his father forever and that he'd live with his soulmate forever, finally feeling loved and wanted. But now, he can't. He won't. It will never happen. Never. And that's what broke Mickey's heart most. It wasn't even the fact that this person had died, it was the fact that his dreams died with them.

Mickey sighed and couldn't help but let a tear fall down his cheek. I'm gonna be forever alone, he said to himself, just like Terry said. Mickey remembered what Terry said to him a couple years back as if it had happened yesterday.

_"You're just a son of a bitch! You're fuckin' nothing and you will never be anything! You're just a fuckin' failure! Who cares if you see in colors? Nobody's there for you anyway. Nobody ever will be. You will never be loved, Mickey, because you're a stupid fucking failure and a disappointment and I'm ashamed to be your father! Now get the fuck out of my house, fucker! I never wanna see you again, is that clear? Or I will fucking kill you this time, bitch!"_

His heart always ached when he let himself think about that moment. Okay, the fucker was abusing his sister, so he had to do something, but he had always been his dad's favorite, and being told everything Terry told him was a first and it hurt.

Mickey sighed again and closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep, even if he knew he won't sleep tonight.

***

It's been about three weeks since his world had faded around him. He still had no idea who his soulmate It bothered him so much that he would never even get to find out his soulmate’s name. Mickey was getting more and more depressed as the days passed. The only thing that was making him get up in the morning and going to work is the fact that he had to take care of Mandy. Mickey has been working as a waiter for three years. The job was shit, the pay was shit but the tips were good. Girls, and even some guys, seemed to like him since he always got a lot of tips at the end of the day.

Mickey was carrying three plates when something happened.

The colors came back.

One second, it was all grey and black, and the next second, there were colors again.

He froze and the plates he was holding crashed on the ground. It made a loud noise, and everybody was staring at him. After thirty seconds or so, Mickey put a fake smile on his face and apologized. While he was cleaning up the fallen dishes, he overheard a conversation between two guys.

"Oh my god!" said the first one, "Lip! I got my colors! Holy shit! Everything is so beautiful!"

"Hey! Congrats, Ian!" said the second one, presumably Lip.

Now that Mickey could see colors again, it was hard not to notice this guy; this Ian. He had flaming red hair and these beautiful green eyes and a pretty freckled face and-

 _Wait a minute. I'm not even gay_ , Mickey told himself.

He rolled his eyes at himself and shake his head off. Once the mess was cleaned up, Mickey went to Ian's table to take their order. He couldn't help but overhear again.

"Do you think I'll met him soon?" the redhead asked the other guy. Lip laughed a little.

"Geez, Ian! You're only fifteen. Give it time. I'm almost eighteen and I still haven't found mine yet, so."

"Yeah, but.." Ian started to say when Mickey interrupted him.

"You know what you want yet?" Mickey asked them, a bit of rudeness in his tone.

Ian and Lip ordered and Mickey was off again. When Ian looked at him while ordering, Mickey felt all fuzzy inside and it was really weird. He had never felt this before. And that smile, Jesus! That had to be the cutest smile ever!

Mickey internally slapped himself.

 _Cutest? What the fuck is wrong with me?_ He asked himself.

The entire time that Ian was there, he looked at Mickey in a not so subtle way and repeatedly flirted with him when Mickey came to their table. When Mickey give them the check, he found it with a phone number on it.

_"Call me sometimes! Ian xx"_

Mickey rolled his eyes and threw it out, even though a part of him wanted to call this number.

***

When his shift finally ended, Mickey came back to his apartment and found Mandy doing her homework.

"You will never guess what the fuck happened today, Mands. "

Mandy didn't even look up and sighed before saying, "what?"

Mickey's eyes went big, as he stared at his sister. "Wow. Could you fucking look more bored?"

Mandy sighed again, finally looking up and frowned when she saw the look on Mickey's face. He looked worried and shocked. "What happened, Mick? Is Iggy okay?"

Iggy had some sort of cancer, but it was a curable one. They learned about it only two months ago, even if Iggy said he knew about it for months. Mickey shook his head.

"No, Iggy's fine, I think."

"Then what is it?"

Mickey frowned before saying, "I'm seeing colors again?" It sounded like a question, because Mickey still don't understand what happened. Mandy frowned too.

"What? Are you sure?"

"Am I sure that I'm seeing colors? Are you fucking kidding me Mandy? What the fuck?!"

"Calm down, bitch. Sorry, I just don't understand why!?"

"Me neither! That's why I'm asking you!" He was raising his voice.

Mandy looked pensive and stayed silent for a couple of minutes. Mickey decided to get a beer before he went in his room. He laid in his bed and started thinking about what happened.

How could this be possible, though? Wasn’t his soulmate supposed to be dead? He couldn't be alive right now, it had been weeks!

Mandy knocked on his door before coming in and she sat on Mickey's bed. She was silent again. After five minutes or so, she started talking.

"Maybe... Maybe there's a new soulmate waiting for you? Maybe they give you another? Maybe... Maybe this was meant to be? Maybe they gave you a wrong one and now they’re fixing it?" She said calmly.

Mickey started to think about this. It didn't make sense. He never heard of this happening to someone else. But he doesn't understand why!

"There's too many fucking maybes! I want answers! Why me, Mands? Huh? I mean... Fuck! My life's already hard, why are they making it harder than it is? What if I never find them again? What if they die again? What would I fucking do, huh?" Mickey was getting angrier and angrier the more he thought about this.

"I don't know, Mickey.." She almost whispered. "Maybe you're special. They know we've been going through shit all of our lives and when your soulmate died, maybe they're giving you a second chance, you know? You deserve to be loved, Mickey, you know that, right?"

"I don't know," he sighed. "I'm feeling like they're just messing with me, you know? That tomorrow I'll wake up and the colors will be gone again..."

"It won't." She kissed Mickey's head gently. "It won't happen, Mick."

***

And Mandy was right. The next day, the colors were still there, and the day after that too. It's been about a week now and he was slowly starting to hope again. But not too much. A part of him still didn't believe this crap and was dreading the moment when everything would fade away again.

He was working the afternoon shift at his job and when he showed up, the redhead from a week ago was there, looking as if he was waiting from someone. Mickey was only hoping he wouldn’t be his waiter. But the readhead was in his section. He sighed loudly before he went there.

"Waiting for someone or do you wanna order?" Mickey asked once he got to Ian's table. Ian didn't see him coming and when he looked up at Mickey, a big smile formed on his face.

"I was actually waiting for you." Mickey frowned. "What are you talking about, kid?"

The smile on Ian's face faded.

"First of all, I'm not a kid," he said, a little anger in his voice. "And second of all, you didn't call me or even texted me!"

Mickey raised an eyebrow. Is this kid for real? "Dude, I get a lot of numbers, why would you even think I would keep yours, let alone fucking use it?"

Ian shrugged. "I don't know," he started with a bitchy kind of voice, "maybe because you're my soulmate, asshole."

Mickey was taken aback. His eyes widened and his mouth was open. He took a little while to digest the information while Ian stared at him expectantly.

"I-I... how do you... what?" He wasn't even able to form sentences.

Ian smiled slightly and blushed. "Well... first, I got my colors about two minutes before we met and I think that explains a lot by itself. But also, I'm feeling these... things inside of me everytime I look at you. Things I've never felt before and I'm sure you felt the same things I'm talking about. I mean... you're supposed to feel it in your bones when you meet your soulmate and... I just..." Ian looked down, playing with his hands. He was really embarrassed. "I can't get you out of my head, even though I've only seen you once..." When he was met with silence, Ian looked up at Mickey. "Could you please say something," he pleaded.

It was like every word Ian said hit Mickey in the face. His head was spinning, his heart was beating so fast in his chest and he felt something like butterflies in his stomach. He understood exactly what the redhead said. Every single thing. He swallowed before he could say anything.

"I... I think I know what you're talking about," Mickey said, blushing while staring into Ian's beautiful green eyes. "I just..." He looked around himself and at the restaurant. "Can you give your number to me again? I'll call you right after my shift, so we could talk, you know?"

Ian had a genuine smile on his face and his eyes were sparkling with joy. He nodded and he took out his phone, giving it to Mickey. Mickey took it and texted himself, giving back the cellphone to the redhead. Ian stood up and they stood awkwardly face to face for a couple of minutes, before Ian's hand met Mickey's. He looked at Mickey shyly.

"Can I..." He was now blushing furiously. "Can I at least just give you a hug? Please?"

Mickey's heart melt. Ian looked so cute with his puppy dog eyes that Mickey couldn't resist him and nodded. Ian smiled again and hugged him.It was awkward at first, but it felt better after a couple of seconds.Mickey felt his heart beat so hard in his chest that he almost thought that he would die in Ian's arms.

But the thing was, it would be okay. Mickey felt like this would be the place he'd like to rest in peace. In Ian's arms. With that thought, Mickey knew. Ian really was his soulmate. And if he died in five seconds, he'd die completely happy, because even if he only met Ian a week ago and that they didn't really spend time together yet, he felt loved already.

And that was all that mattered.


End file.
